Good day kind reader,
I want to tell you all about the worst restaurant shift I ever worked. Guests were waiting a long time for the food to arrive, we had staff shortages blah blah .....I could go on but I think you've got it. I could feel my whole body screaming for me to leave the job that was making me unhappy. I had been a waitress for longer than I cared to admit at that time. My soul couldn't take the stagnation any longer. I was at breaking point. Without thinking, I collected my belongings with the quick grasp of my hand, pushed the hair out of my face and, as if in a Matrix movie, I watched everything slow down around me. Observing one foot moving in front of the other, I moved towards the front door. 'Houston, I've left the building'. "This is it," I thought, "This is my 'Hollywood movie storm out and never come back' moment". By the time I knew it I was in my car and had the key in the ignition. My five senses were on high alert, ready to spring into action at any time. I could smell the lingering stale food smell on my uniform and as I looked down, I noticed the sticky BBQ sauce stain on my apron that had made its way there during service. I sat in the car daring myself to drive. Wanting to desperately do something adventurous and spontaneous for once in my life. This was my chance to make a stand and fight for what I wanted. Instead, I decided I needed the words of wisdom from my Husband. After a lot of tears and high pitched tones from me, He calmed me and with no uncertain terms concluded that I should start the car and get driving! Fifteen minutes later, my hands were still on the steering wheel. The voice in my head and the beating of my heart were louder than I have ever heard before. I was talking myself off the ledge. Why? What exactly was holding me back? Whose permission did I need to leave the job that no longer served me?....
Unfortunately, this antic of mine didn't have the ending that you may expect or look back on, would make a fantastic read. The truth is I didn't drive off into the sunset and arrive at 'My Happy Place'. I went back inside the restaurant and finished my shift. I've thought long and hard since that day about why I didn't make a stand? I now realise it was my values. My values of justice, responsibility and kindness outweighed my need to flee. My team members and guests were too important to leave behind and that alone was enough. My values shaped that decision. Ever since that day, I have learnt that I have a responsibility not to be happy in my life, but to live a life that is in accordance with my values, and that in turn will make me happy beyond measure.
Three days later I handed in my resignation and never looked back.
If you want to know more about me, these links lead the way